Jeb Tiberius Sausagefreak
About Jeb Tiberius Sausagefreak, also known as 'Jeb T. Sausagefreak, (born 19 March 1968, aged 51) '''has been an actor, musician, TV star, a priest, and a physicist. Most of his jobs are covered in the series: ''Jeb's Jobs. Jeb is a bipedal sausage-shaped creature who has personalities and traits similar to humans. Compared to the other creatures in his world, he is relatively tall. He also wears yellow-framed (originally black-framed) glasses, though in the opening of Technical Support, Kids TV and Mr. Soft, he isn't seen wearing them. Personality "]] Jeb is friendly, funky , fun-loving , miserable, kind-hearted , pleasant , funny musical and intelligent, though he can be vulgar, easily frustrated, and incredibly sarcastic at times. He can also be grumpy when given a P45 slip or being annoyed or harassed by idiotic people. He has a strong Eastern Scotland-America-Britain-London accent, and sounds very nasal at times. This is strengthened by the fact he lacks a nose. He also seems to be quite violent, and regularly owns and sometimes uses dangerous weapons and explosives, such as rifles and dynamite. If he cannot find a gun or bomb, he will use anything he can find, such as a stapler or a plastic ruler. He isn't very excitable, and gets irritated when he is forced to join in the happy and friendly themes when he was working as a children's TV presenter. Relationships Ned Ned was Jeb's best friend. They sometimes watch films on the TV together during the night. Jeb had a tendency to rudely invade Ned's privacy. One example of this is when Ned is on the toilet and Jeb is seen looking through the window. He also regularly insults him, like when he calls him a "twat" in Tippity Top Gear shortly before blowing him up with a large amount of dynamite, sending pieces of him everywhere. Roger Roger is shown to be a constant annoyance to Jeb, particularly when he is working. Even though all he is doing is trying to gain a friendship with Jeb, he ends up annoying Jeb to no extent. Roger's insistence even made Jeb shoot him with a stapler out of extreme anger and madness. The relationship seems to improve over time, and they get on well during Tippity Top Gear. He says "fuck you!" to Jeb. Tim and Tom Tim and Tom are puppet socks that are also annoyances to Jeb. Despite finding the pair annoying, he has to play along with it as it was part of the children's TV show he was on. Jeb also finds their jokes not funny and even points out to them that the children aren't morons. Appearances ''Technical Support 1:39 Jeb is working in an office in a technical support building. He is preparing to eat a large sandwich but is interrupted by a customer. He answers the telephone and is told that the person's printer isn't working. Jeb tells them to check their computer's screen and asks for what it says. They say "out of paper" and Jeb tells them to put some paper in. He then hangs up and puts the phone down, but as soon as he put it down, someone else rang up. Jeb answers them and is told that their phone isn't working. Jeb asks if they're sure and then the person on the other end of the phone realizes that the phone is indeed working. The person thanks Jeb, who bids the person farewell and hangs up; but then someone else calls. They jokingly ask for someone called Jock Strap. Jeb says that he gets it and hangs up, shortly before calling them a moron. The phone yet again rings but Jeb accidentally answers "testicle support" and hangs up. Jeb is then phoned by someone else who is trying to access a website which is blocked by their computer's firewall. Jeb answers that it is the firewall that is blocking it and explains that the firewall is "a big wall of fire where you'll burn in internal damnation" and then hangs up. Someone else calls and says that they lost their car keys. Jeb explains that this is technical support and hangs up. The phone stops ringing so Jeb prepares to eat his sandwich but is unfortunately interrupted by another customer. He asks if they tried kicking it and then says that is probably the reason it isn't working and hangs up. Immediately, another person calls and Jeb asks what they were trying to photocopy. He then says that it would leave a smear and tells them to try using paint thinner. Someone else calls and tells Jeb that a man has get something caught in a shredder and is loosing a lot of blood. Jeb advises that they should call an ambulance instead. Someone calls and asks for the weather during the weekend. Jeb is annoyed and hangs up again. Someone else phones up and Jeb tells them to turn the bit at the top and they tell him that water is coming out. Jeb tells them not to call again and hangs up. The same prank caller from earlier phones up again and asks for Mr. Octopus. Jeb says he gets the jokes and says that they're still not funny. The telephone rings one more time, and Jeb calms down, ignoring it briefly and starting to get an idea. He answers the phone and tells the caller to pour his 'mild tea' down the power unit. This causes a fire and an electrical failure, and Jeb evacuates the building and eats his Subway in one hungry gulp before the fire and rescue service show up. He is handed a P45 slip, which was given either from being blamed for the accident or by being forced to resign after the fire. Kids TV 5:00 ]] Jeb is seen presenting a children's TV show called ''The Hello Show. He waves at the camera and says that he is waving before murmuring "that's another valuable life skill mastered". He is then greeted by a pair of sock puppets called Tim and Tom. Jeb says that he has a pair of socks like them, before wondering where his socks went. Jeb is asked what he is doing by Tim and Jeb replies by saying that he is waving. He asks if they can wave, before realizing that they don't have arms. After an awkward silence and a peculiar sound effect, Tim and Tom asks Jeb if he wants to join in with their song. Jeb is reluctant, but he has no choice. Tim and Tom sing but before Jeb could say a line, he is interrupted, and the song ends. Jeb said to the audience that: "they were funny, weren't they?" Before he whispers: "not" under his breath. Jeb proceeds to show some pictures that children have drawn for the show. He shows the first one from a girl called Jessica from Swindon who had drawn a picture of a balloon and a sunny sky. He flipped the balloon which revealed an image of Jessica which shocked Jeb due to her grotesque appearance. He shows a picture from a teenage called Gav, who is 16 years old. Jeb asks if he was a bit of a late developer. He then showed the picture which was of a penis ejaculating. Jeb stretched the truth and said that it was a coconut tree with two hairy coconuts. Tim and Tom reappear quickly and asks Jeb if he wants to hear a joke. Jeb asks if he could "reserve judgment". The pair say the terrible joke and laugh obnoxiously, before Jeb whispers to them that the children aren't morons. It is then time to see what Jeb's friend Ned is doing. Jeb asks if he is behind the square window, the round window or the sausage-shaped window. Jeb looks through the sausage-shaped window and sees Ned on the toilet "'avin' a poo". An angry Ned immediately slams the door shut and Jeb waves goodbye to his best friend. He points out that he is waving again. A door bell ringing and Jeb says that it is the postman. Jeb goes to see what was sent whilst singing a song filled with humourous euphemisms. He opens the post box and the letter. The letter is in fact a P45 and Jeb gets angry. He then leaves while taking back everything he owns, including Tim and Tom (who are revealed to actually be a person's hands). ''Crazy Jeb 2:13 Jeb is shown reenacting the Crazy Frog scene. Whilst acting it out, he checks the script and then resumes his performance. When he does the classic fart, he excuses himself and then leaps off screen. Jeb then wonders how he can make 10,000,000 pounds doing that and says that it is bollocks. At the end, Jeb is seen polishing the classic Crazy Frog helmet. Jebadonna 5:34 Jeb is seen reenacting a Madonna music video, but he ends up tripping over the music player. The Song Encompassed : Phaser , Bass Guitar , Bit Crusher , Bass , Violin , Strings & Vocals. Mr. Soft 4:46 Jeb is seen singing along to Cockney Rebel's "Mr. Soft" (without wearing his glasses) alongside Ned before leaving the studio. Skiing 2:53 Jeb is at the top of the mountain wearing skis. He glances at a book about skiing and pushes himself off the mountain to begin. Jeb narrowly misses several bumps in the mountain, but he then relaxes. While he has plenty of time, Jeb starts eating a sandwich, writing a postcard, and then knitting. Unfortunately, Jeb ends up skiing off the edge of a cliff and falls down, screaming in terror. Luckily, Jeb lands on his feet and is seemingly fine. But then his ski poles fall and land on his head, making him collapse on the floor, unconscious. Shooting 2:00 Jeb is seen playing clay pigeons with Ned. Jeb inserts the bullet into the gun and orders Ned to pull, to which he does. Jeb proceeds to fire the gun, but it backfires when he is shot back far away. Things Not To Do During The Movie 1:02 Bumper 1 Jeb snatches the TV remote away from Ned so that he can watch a programme that had just started. Bumper 2 Jeb reenacts a scene from a film with a woman saying that she loves a man named Roger. Jeb is seen holding a pair of oranges to represent the woman's breasts. Bumper 3 Jeb is eating a bag of crisps while watching a film, but Ned comes and uses a vacuum cleaner in front of the TV, ruining and blocking out the film. Bumper 4 Jeb is talking on the phone with someone, but he can't hear the person on the other end. So he switches off the TV, much to Ned's dismay. Bumper 5 Jeb constantly puts his hand over Ned's eyes so he can't see the film, but an irritated Ned keeps pushing them out of the way. Bumper 6 Ned accidentally farts during the film and Jeb looks at him in disgust. Bumper 7 Ned is watching a film in anticipation, but Jeb switches the channel, much to Ned's dismay. Bumper 8 While watching a film, Jeb explains that it is all done with computers nowadays and it isn't the same. Bumper 9 While watching a loving scene, Jeb kisses Ned on the face. In disgust, Ned falls to the ground. Bumper 10 Jeb and Ned hold up boards saying, "Things Not To Do During The Movie" and the makers of the bumpers. Jeb's Jobs 3 Jeb is working in Administrative Services for the offices of BlimCo. Here he meets Roger, who is clearly lonely and looking for a friend. Jeb wastes time playing a violent game on his computer. It is also revealed later in the episode that Roger wastes time at the offices there too by looking at pornography at his desk, and he offers Jeb a wet wipe to clean up, much to Jeb's disgust. Roger and Jeb chat calmly between calls, meanwhile Roger continuously picks his ears. Jeb is bombarded by more idiotic callers. Roger is desperate for friendship, and starts too annoy Jeb when he keeps going on about inviting Jeb over to cook some carbonara, install a brand-new wireless router and watch some Star Trek in DVD, stating the setup of the router: "won't take long". Roger fails to realise that Jeb is trying to take an idiotic caller asking if the company has any vacancies for their candidates. However, the caller doesn't understand that there are no vacancies, no matter how much Jeb tries to explain. Jeb is surrounded by the caller's stupidity, Roger's droning and phones loudly ringing around him. This tips Jeb over the edge. He knocks over the wireless, touchscreen phone set and shouts at Roger, asking him: "What?!" angrily. Roger asks if he Jeb can: "be his friend". Jeb looks for a gun, and loading a stapler instead, as it was the closest thing he could find. A Christmas Message From Jeb 0:39 Jeb sings a Christmas carol called ''Jebby Crimble. Suddenly, he is hit with a snowball by someone (possibly Ned). Angered, he gives the V sign to him and tells them to f**k off. ''Jeb Does Charlie Bit My Finger Jeb gets his entire hand eaten by the baby Charlie. In the end, Jeb violently smacks the baby on the back of his head, knocking him onto the floor with no remorse, calling him a: "little twat". Jeb's Jobs 4'' Jeb is a priest, but is careless at his job, and after irritating and offending God and others, he is sent to talk to God. Jeb is "fuckin' fired" and is given a stone tablet P45. Trivia * Jeb seems to have got a new job at a local news and talk show, with a supposed female version of his species as his co-host. There seems to be no tension between the two in the trailer, and they may be dating. * Jeb shows signs of psychotic tendencies, as he does not feel remorse when he gets people hurt or witnesses people being hurt, which is seen during his rampage with the stapler and blowing up Ned. He also shamelessly smacks a baby off of a chair, injuring him, and even going as far as to grin at his deed. * Jeb seems very tolerant to pain. He was not concerned about having supposedly icy water (which turned out to be a pile of shit) poured on him, and shows no signs of discomfort when he has a P45 slip stapled onto his forehead. When he has his entire hand eaten, he does not seem to show signs of extreme pain, just mild pain. He is also unreactive to being injured in his hobbies. * Jeb's species have purple bodies and no visible clothes or genitalia. When Jeb works as a priest and visits a primary school, he is questioned this, but never provides an explanation. * Jeb's universe may be more advanced than ours. A lot of devices are completely wireless and touchscreen since Episode 3, (although some old-fashioned throughout the whole series). This leads to a theory that their is a multiculturalist society in the UK of Jeb is set further in the future, while retaining some of the old technology, like the Ford C Max, owned by Mr Jizzum, one of Jeb's neighbours, who likes to park his car in front of Jeb's driveway to irritate Jeb. The resulting world is like a mix of 2002 and 2035 or something, although it is revealed when Jeb has a job as an astronomer/physicist that each upload on Jeb's YouTube channel is set at that date of the original upload. Category:Characters Category:Male Category:Protagonists Category:Antagonists Category:Redeemed Villains